Everybody wants to get married and live happily ever after. But when things do not turn out that way, people tend to get into a state of denial.

All of us who get into a marriage believe that it will last forever, just like the fairy tale. This is not the way it really happens in real life. There has to be some way to keep the love and commitment as it was. Nobody is thinking about how to save my marriage when they are just married.

But something happens along the way when people are married. All these contribute to the marriage going sour. Rough times do not affect the marriage. People go through tough times and survive. This will take place only if both people are in love and truly committed. Then no partner will ever have to think about how to save my marriage.

It is always hard to let go. The grieving process has two important parts – denial and bargaining. It becomes difficult to recapture things when they start to go wrong.

There is always only one person who wants out of the marriage, once it ends. To leave the spouse is what this person wants. One who would have had no such thoughts is the other person. Who had never seen it coming. Once this person is told by the spouse that he/she wants out, this person is devastated. This happens because the person who wants out of the marriage does not wish to come back or try to work on it again. The fact may be that the person had been wanting to leave since quite some time. Quite a while ago that person may have fallen out of love, but the other party may still be in love. The marriage should continue, is what the person in love wants.

A marriage is made by two persons, and the fault and blame is usually not of only one person. One person is generally more at fault than the other person. Whose fault it is, is not the question every time. Two people may get married to each other but they may not be suited to each other. They do not get married for the right reasons at times. It may have happened this way that they had fallen in love and things had been good for some time. It may be found out later that this is no basis for a committed or a lasting marriage. Hence both may start blaming each other and making accusations. This is not nice and definitely not happy most of the time.

The partner who is thinking about how to save my marriage is the one who wants to continue the marriage. The most hurt is this person. The love and trusts for the spouse is still there. Everything will eventually work out, is what this person feels. They only need to keep trying. Basic stage of grief is denial. Never giving up hope is the basic human nature. This is not the way things usually work out.

Still feel that you have questions? Would you like to get expert's advice? Go to Dave Wilson's website to save your marriage.